The Reformed Life

Speech matters. What we say and how we talk may seem insignificant, but in reality, what comes out of our mouths reveals a great deal about the spiritual nature of our hearts. Jesus says, “For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks (Matt. 12:34).” You may (or may not) be surprised to know that far from being silent or whispering, the Bible has a lot to say about our speech. 

• “Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he who opens wide his lips comes to ruin (Prov. 13:3).” 
• “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear (Eph. 4:29).”
• “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person (Col. 4:6).” 
• “Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving (Eph. 5:4).” 
• “A fool gives vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back (Prov. 29:11).” 
• “A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit (Prov. 15:4).” 
• “The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but the perverse tongue will be cut off (Prov. 10:31).” 

This is not an exhaustive list, but you get the point. What we say and how we speak are not trivial matters, at least not according to the Scriptures. For our time today, I want us to consider two passages of Scripture. First, James 3:1-12. 

[1] Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. [2] For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. [3] If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. [4] Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. [5] So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. 

How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire!  [6] And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. [7] For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, [8] but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. [9] With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. [10] From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. [11] Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? [12] Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.

According to John Piper, “James 3:1-12 contains the single most sustained discussion in the New Testament on the use of the tongue.”

In context, James addresses teachers. He says, “Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness (v.1).” James’ address to teachers is relevant to the teaching ministry of the church because words lie in the center of the teaching ministry. The speech of teachers/preachers directly impacts their congregations. 

Although James speaks directly to teachers, we all use our tongues. Piper says, “If the mastery of the tongue is a sign of maturity, it is so for all Christians.” Our speech reveals the reality of our hearts. James 3 shows the enormous power the tongue wields.  He equates the tongue to a bit in a horse’s mouth (v.3-5) and the rudder on a boat (v.4). The tongue is powerful. 

You probably have heard the saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” What a lie! Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can crush your heart! Can you attest to this reality? Have you ever been harmed by words? Have you ever been haunted by words spoken by another? Piper says, “A sharp word, a loose sentence, a callous aside can cause a conflagration that cannot be extinguished. Words can consume and destroy a life.” 

“How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire (v.5)!” A single spark can destroy a forest, so it is with our speech. A single word can destroy a relationship that has taken years to cultivate. 

As much as I’d love to stay in James 3, I want to look at another passage of Scripture. That passage is Proverbs 4:24, and this passage lies at the heart of why I wanted to write this post. The text says, “Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you.” 

In Psalm 12, David prays for protection from the ungodly. Who are these ungodly people? They are those who “Utter lies to his neighbor; with flattering lips and a double heart they speak (v.2, emphasis added).” 

A double-hearted person that offers crooked speech is untrustworthy. They are people that lack integrity. They fail to let their ‘yes’ be ‘yes’ and their ‘no’ be ‘no.’ They are chameleons seeking to blend into whatever environment they find themselves in. They are flatterers. They are selfish. They say what they think others want to hear to “gain ground” with their listener(s). Schemers and gossips are characterized by double-speech. They are liars. They say one thing to one person and another to others. What causes this sort of speech? The fear of man. 

To take from Ed Welch’s book, people are big, and God is small (to them). They care more about the applause of man than they do faithful integrity. Before we begin to point mental fingers, we need to realize that this is a struggle for everyone. We are all susceptible to this temptation and sin. It is easy to find yourself caught in this trap. What’s the cure? 

Fear God 

Proverbs 29 says, “The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is safe (v.25).” The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever. We were created for worship. However, sin distorted this. Because of indwelling sin, we often seek favor from others. We often seek to obtain our value & identity from external personal sources. Why do we say what we do to certain people? Why do we say one thing to one and then change our opinions to another? Is it not because we’re yearning for affirmation? Is it not because something deep within us is crying out to be liked/applauded? We have an idolatry issue. Our speech changes from person to person because we ascribe them authority and honor where only God should be. 

As Proverbs 29 states, the fear of man is a snare. Why? Because it is a false god. It cannot free us or provide what we need. However, those who trust in the Lord are safe. Why? Because He truly is God. God has the power to free us from the fear of man. He does this by confronting us through the work of His Spirit, pointing out our shortcomings. Whom do you fear?  Listen to the words of the Apostle Paul. He writes, “For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ (Gal. 1:10).” Whom do you seek to please? God or man. Choose this day whom you will serve. 

Know Your Identity 

In the book of James, he writes, “Of his own will he brought us forth by the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures (James 1:18).” To the Corinthians, Paul writes, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come (2 Cor. 5:17).” Christian, you are made new in Christ. You are declared righteous through the substitutionary life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Remember that. Hold that truth near and dear to your heart. Don’t let go. 

What God has to say about you in Christ is greater than any applause you’ll receive from man. When the gospel grips our minds, it’ll grip our hearts. When the gospel grips our hearts, it will grip our lives. Gospel thinking should lead to Gospel living.  

Immerse Yourself in God’s Word 

Paul, writing to the Colossians, says, “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him (Col. 3:16-17, emphasis added).” John Piper writes, “The most important single aid to my ability to use my tongue for the glory of Jesus is allowing the Word of God to dwell in me so richly that I cannot speak with any other accent.” 

In His High Priestly Prayer, Jesus prays, “Sanctify them in truth; your word is truth (John 17:17).” There can be no progress in sanctification apart from God’s Word. Again, Piper is helpful. He writes, “The more I awake in the morning and feed myself with the Scriptures and the more I am saturated with the Word under a biblical ministry, the more the word of Christ will do the sanctifying work in me and on me, and consequently the more Christ will train my tongue as his word molds and shapes me.” 

Before I finish, I want to give two more points to ponder. I’ll title these confession and abstinence. 

Confession 

If, as you read through this became convicted, I would encourage you to confess and repent before the Lord. John writes, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9).” He will not turn you away. He will not break a bruised reed. Go to Him through contrition and cry out for His mercy and grace. You won’t be disappointed. 

Abstinence 

The Bible has much to say about double speech, perverse talk, gossip, and slander. If you are confronted by another, who attempts to do any of these before you, abstain. Call them to repentance. Tell them that you have no room for that. Encourage them, if they have a grievance with a brother or sister, to take that to them. The body of Christ will be better for it. 

Let’s honor the Lord, friends. 

Soli Deo Gloria,

Josh Chambers

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